Saturday, June 28, 2014

             When it comes to urban noisemakers there are two types:

                                                                         The  Nightlifers

These people either have a plethora of great wealth or one hell of a great credit rating because they seem to have an endless supply of funds for purchasing of all manners of alcoholic beverages and also always seem to have gas money to keep their vehicles running up and down the streets nonstop at all hours of the night.
As one can guess these folks don't exactly "tip-toe and whisper" their way around town while engaging in their ultrahedonistic activities.  They figure since they don't finally get to sleep until 4:00 A.M. no-one else should be allowed to do so either.


                                                                          The Earlybirders

These idiots are the morning commuters, the city refuse workers, construction crews demolishing the building next door to wherever you live, delivery services who "have to" come around at 7:00 A.M. to drop off packages and who honk their horns repeatedly until someone finally comes out to greet them, service providers (plumbing, exterminators, maintenance crews, inspectors), road repair crews who "have to" get started at 6:00 A.M. to continue their resurfacing job on the street and sidewalks of the block you live on, who think "just because they get up at 5:00 or 6:00 A.M. everyone else should too".

And I'm the "urban dweller", the one-in-the-middle, who has to suffer being beset and vexed by these eternal morons. 

I wonder: How do these idiots all manage to find sleep themselves? You would think each one's lifestyle patterns, being so antithetical, would interfere with the other one's, but somehow I seem to be the only one affected by all this.

Maybe these people live in their own isolated soundproof enclaves out in the woods somewhere and only come into the city to either party or to work.

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